4th of august 2026 , 7:50am
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i hope you're having a great day.
today was something strange! it felt like nothing happened, but im doing some new things, so it felt out of the ordinary. most of my day was taken up by a lot of video editing and a lot of translating... it took approximately 8 hours, because i translated two clips. which were only 5 and 2 minutes! the amount of effort compared to the output is insane... still, it feels like my japanese mightve improved slightly. i learnt a lot of new words and grammar, and by translating stuff i already knew, maybe its reinforcing it or something... even if it wont, it was still fun, if extremely grueling. ive only translated media from japanese to english three times now, so im still completely out of my depth! oh, i havent mentioned what it is yet. its the same as what i did last entry! its two clips from the chiral night rhythm carnival. i translated the full segment where they go into lamento, i guess? im not sure how else to explain it. and a small segment from the beginning, where akira, konoe, youji, and aoba all meet each other for the first time. i kept replaying every piece of dialogue until i was absolutely sure that i understood what it meant... i think ive seen those two clips more than ive been to the dentist. even if they arent one hundred percent translated correctly, im still proud that i even managed to finish them. although, im still very sorry if these translations are completely useless. i am very bad at most things. also, im glad that i got to hear more dialogue from konoe!
here's the clip of akira, konoe, youji, and aoba.
this one was very fun to do! aoba petting konoe's head was funny. and the fact that youji's little nui plush creature is bawling his eyes out the whole time... youji really went through some absolutely insane stuff... poor guy. and akira's one just shouts, and aoba's sounds like an octopus! its fun to see them all together. i wonder what itd be like if towa had been there.
and here's the clip of the lamento segment.
this one seriously drove me up the wall. but i completed it, so yay! its still so funny to me that rin thought that bardo was just some freaky old guy in a catboy cosplay... it was fun to see them interacting. rin and bardo are funny! and everyone poking fun at konoe... forever. i had to change mink's "一日ですぐわかるな" line, because it didnt sound very good in english. and i was wondering about how much liberty i could take with changing the meaning slightly. im still not even sure if i interpreted it correctly and it means something completely different, but i changed it to "seeing it from a mile away" instead of "quickly/immediately knowing it in a day." but i guess they both mean the ability to understand something quickly.
so yeah, thats what ive been doing. oh, also, heres a song called white sugar from killer7!
here it is.
it sounds so cool. songs from suda games are so good... well, thats all that i have to write. thanks for reading! please stay safe!
1st of august 2026 , 10:49pm
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hello, i hope you're doing well!
today im so amazed by how incredible other people are. that might sound strange... im not sure how else to put it! ive been browsing other people's personal websites more often lately, which is why. its sort of just amazing to see what other people love, how their website represents them as a person, and their hobbies and endeavors... seeing how different everyone is really puts into perspective how much there is to see in this world for me. which sounds kind of stupid, right? but its true! so i was just thinking that lately... also about how much im starting to resemble my dad with each day that passes. we are both quite boring... and i was just thinking, im going to be a very boring man one day. well, i guess that im already boring. im ready to become a middle-aged man.
what else can i say... ive been feeling quite weak lately. its a little hard to move my body. when i ate earlier it was exhausting, and then i thought oh man... my sleep schedule and my eating habits are seriously terrible! this always seems to happen during the summer. as soon as i got back from my holiday, my body just collapsed on itself again! well, i dont mind. oh, i got gifted a really nice wax barbour jacket by my uncle the other day. we were at my grandma's house for my dad's birthday and he had left it there in storage, so he asked me if i wanted it. its really nice! its about 20 years old now, but its in great condition. ill need to rewax it, but im happy.
here it is.
i worked on a fun little project last week. i actually spent all night on it, so i was dead tired for when i had to visit family the other day... but it was worth it! the desktop icon for lamento is only 32x32, and ive always been slightly irked by that... im not sure if theres a higher quality out there somewhere, but ive looked around and havent been able to find it. there are two icons within the lamento.exe file. one is of the compass graphic that pops up every time a new location is introduced in-game, and the other is of kaltz. i wanted to upscale the compass icon to 256x256 myself, so i took a picture of the compass graphic as i was playing lamento and painstakingly removed the background by hand and edited it to look like the original icon... augh... it took so long! the one i made doesnt look exactly like the original sadly, since i edited the colors. and honestly, i dont think that it made much of a difference. i actually prefer the old one. but i thought that i might as well use the one i made, since i put so much effort into making it!
heres the icon.
i really do spend my time making strange things! anyway, ive been thinking about all of the mistakes that ive made lately, and ive been quite bothered by them. you cannot change the past. all i can do is realize my mistakes and make sure that i dont repeat them. but still, i wish there was a chance for me to go back and fix what ive done. but in order for me to do that, i would have to erase who i am today. thats quite annoying, with how your mistakes are apart of who you are as well. but in a way, its kind of comforting. no matter how much i mess up and think that its all over, there is always a chance for me to grow and learn and continue on. isnt that a core theme in lamento?!
speaking of lamento, ive been working on my lamento shrine lately. it really is a labor of love... ive written around 11,000 words to do with the characters, lore and worldbuilding, and its slowly draining my soul. i never knew thati could love something so much. lamento really is something so wonderful. and i learnt something new about it today! i was kind of frustrated about how i didnt recognize this as a theme before, like how could i have missed that?! i can kind of believe it, since i am an idiot. but i read someone's thoughts on lamento earlier and im very glad that i did. its about lamento's theme of the truth being hidden to time, and only being known to a select few. though time will warp events and will become more obscured over time, the truth exists in the hearts of the select few who seek it out - aka shui and konoe. and although the truth has been lost to most, (which is leaks actually being a good person who was just bastardized by the people of ransen), there will always be proof that the truth existed at some point in time, and that is through shui's song. through shui's song, he is able to keep alive the true leaks that existed, rather than the version of leaks that has warped over time, even after leaks' death. the people of ransen were scared of the unknown, and fearing something that they were unwilling to accept, leaks was painted as an evil sorcerer who bewitched shui to destroy ransen. that is the version of leaks that became the truth - but through those select few who knew, even for a short time, that leaks loved the forest, and that he was capable of feeling love, they are able to keep the true version of him alive. through the song! which is proof of their bond! isnt that nice? the bond that shui and leaks had is proof of the truth - even if the world rejected leaks, their bond proves that leaks once existed as a simple cat living in the forest. its sort of like that for konoe too... konoe was rejected by karou and had to leave the village because of a curse that others were terrified of. they were terrified of the unknown. he was rejected the same way leaks was rejected by ransen - he would have been killed or eaten alive to erase the fact that the cat with the legendary curse was a cat of karou. they didnt understand, and they refused to understand because of their fear. they blame their misfortune on an easy target and they are erased. but the ones who love konoe know the truth. through konoe's song, he is able to live on and make the truth known. he does not reject his heart and he walks his path to the utmost. thats what shui said, right? i guess thats his truth. always, through a bond with someone else, the truth will be kept alive. im not sure if i explained it very well! i found it interesting to think about.
ah, i worked on another little thing too... i was watching a playthrough of the chiral night rhythm carnival, and there was a scene that i found quite funny. unfortunately, the playthrough was not translated into english, and because of my downright poor japanese skills, i was grasping the gist of the plot at most. but i attempted to translate the scene anyway, because i wanted to put it here... it was quite humbling to be honest, and i dont think i translated their speech patterns into english very well. but clear, zenya, and asato are a very funny trio!
here's the clip!
its fun making things... well, thats all i have to write. sorry, this was quite long! thank you for reading, and please stay safe!
15th of july 2026 , 10:21pm
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hello, i hope you're doing well!
the weather is really nice right now since its summer. in the northern hemisphere, at least! i hope you're having good weather wherever you are. its been so hot that im not sure if i can take much more of this! not much has been going on for me recently. oh, i picked some lovely strawberries from my garden the other day. and by 'some' i mean only three... i didnt want to eat them all at once. they just slid right off the stalk! i picked some last month, and they were still quite sour. but now theyre very sweet and tasty! i was happy, because i ran out of sugar to put in my tea, so having something sweet along with it sort of counteracted the bitterness of the tea. home-grown strawberries are definitely the best! i ordered two little pins of konoe and an acrylic standee of asato (lamento) the other day, and i know that i said that i wasnt going to buy anything useless for a while, but i had some extra cash and thought hell, why not! they arrived today, and im very happy.
i didnt think to plan a place to put my can badges on my shelf, so theyre balanced precariously on chris the bonsai right now... ill probably just rest them on the actual shelf eventually, because having to move and reposition them every time i need to water chris is going to be very annoying! yuupon's illustrations of konoe are very cool. yuupon's illustration of asato sitting on that log is also one of my favorites of him! id like the coin figure eventually as well. its very nice! my shelves are relatively empty because i like them to look neat, but im imagining that my shelf will be crowded eventually lol. im happy.
heres a picture of my lamento shelf! (+ chris the bonsai)
and i've been listening to the dolls nest soundtrack lately... i think that dolls nest is nitroplus' first 3d game, and it looks very cool. and the soundtrack is incredible! i put some of the songs from it on my mp3 player. im such a massive crybaby that i cried listening to twin embryos earlier... music just does that! id recommend listening to any of the soundtrack, especially if you like nier:automata's ost. some of the songs give off the same really haunting impression!
you can listen to a song from the soundtrack here.
its called breath of steel. the credits are in the description! well, other than that, i haven't been up to much lately. i had chicken curry for dinner, which was very tasty. i ate with my sister while she was filling out her japanese workbook. shes been getting really into learning japanese lately, and she told me that she impressed her friends at school by teaching them some phrases. shes learning a lot, its nice! we ran out of peach and lemon iced tea, so i had to drink regular tea... i love peach tea. its very tasty, but everyone else in my family says that the lemon flavor is better. peach is better! ive been playing a lot of lamento lately, but doing that just reminds me that i haven't finished the drawing of konoe that ive been doing and i feel sad. oh, i noticed something funny in one of konoe's voicelines earlier. im a little embarrassed that i hadn't noticed this in my other playthroughs... once konoe finishes speaking, you can hear someone flipping a page of the script that they forgot to edit out i think lol. mustve been kazutoshi himself!
take a listen if you'd like!
how the hell did i not notice that before? am i stupid? hmm...
ive been thinking that id like to take on looking after a new plant this summer. i have six plants in my room right now, one of them being a bonsai tree. ive managed to keep them all alive for a while now, so im thinking of going to a plant nursery near me that i like to visit to pick out a little easy plant to look after. maybe ill ask someone to come with me. it might be fun, since the weather will probably be good. one thing that i like about summer is that everyone seems to be happier because of the nice weather. its nice to see people having fun outside!
my laptop that ive been using to draw has finally died after 5 years of service, so i have to switch over to my everyday laptop to draw now. i have to use my drawing tablet with it to draw, so my setup has changed a little now. i have to put my laptop on my windowsill, because my super small desk wont fit both my drawing tablet and my laptop. annoying!
this is where the magic happens...
but hey, i feel super professional using my drawing tablet! ive had it for a while, but i always just preferred not using it. but when i click the button shortcut on my stylus to zoom in, it feels super smooth and professional... also, my current laptop is way faster and less laggy than my older laptop! i cant believe i managed to produce work on such a laggy device before... my chair is still incredibly uncomfortable, and my lamp is still incredibly blinding, and i sit like a shrimp. but graphic design and illustration are my passions... yes... so ill continue to work diligently.
well, thats all! thank you for reading!
2nd of june 2026 , 12:53am
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hello! its great to see you.
my only class today was cancelled, but i didnt know that until i got there... i was quite frustrated about that. i got home quickly though, so its fine! once i got home, i started drawing another comic that i thought of. it took around four hours i think, which is kinda insane. its only four panels! still, it was fun to draw, so its alright. i thought that it'd be funny if deibu suddenly changed the weather by flicking on a light switch from inside the house, so i went with that premise.
you can view it here!
drawing yufo and deibu has been quite relaxing for me, since i dont need to worry about it being super great or anything. its just fun to draw. with my usual artstyle, i always want it to be perfect, but when im drawing yufo and deibu, i just want to get the general message across to you. i think ive improved from my first comic! im not very used to drawing deibu, but hes just a guy, so ill probably get used to drawing him soon. i tried to make him cuter this time, since i wasnt happy with how i drew him in my last comic. sorry, i probably shouldve said this earlier, but yufo is the cat, and deibu is the guy! i like the colors that i used this time, and how the color palette of the panels matches vertically. half is yellow, and half is green. i wanted the yellow panels to be like, "oh, things are happy now!" something like that. im not really sure how to describe it. and the green panels go from "wow, this is so sad..." dark green, to "yay, we're outside in nature!" green. this is a horrible way of explaining my thought process... anyway, i enjoyed drawing yufo and deibu looking very happy. it gives me a warm feeling lol. oh, and i tried to make yufo's crying face very ugly. i realized earlier that yufo looks like the pixels of the white cats that are around my website, so i guess thats a nice coincidence. i never really noticed!
oh, and if you've read the dispatch logs on this website in the poetry section and are wondering if theres a correlation between yufo and chairman yuufoo, there totally isnt! they are different characters. chairman yuufoo does not look like a cat... though i guess they could, since they can shapeshift and everything. i shouldve noticed that their names are too similar, but to be honest, i forgot about chairman yuufoo. the mascots around the website appear as characters in the dispatch logs, by the way! they're written from the perspective of the librarian in the poetry section of this website, machi. the other mascots are related to machi and are their fellow coworkers! i love machi, eiri, fushi, and hoshi very much. maybe i shouldnt mention hoshi, since that name hasnt appeared in the logs yet... oh well! neither has fushi's, but theyre still the mascot in the shrine section. you can learn more about them by just reading the logs if you're interested, i wont go on about it here any more lol.
i had hamburg steak for dinner yesterday, and i really want it again. it was really good... hmm... you know, i was thinking earlier about how amazing it is that a single piece of art can fill you with so much joy, and introduce you to so many other cool things. and your life is just greatly improved by this single thing that a human, or multiple humans, have made. its so wonderful to just be absolutely rabid about a specific thing. you can think about it all the time, and its nice to like something. there are a lot of things to hate in this world, but theres also a bunch of cool stuff. fanboying is a great way to feel happy. you you can even create new things related to the thing you're interested in yourself... im very happy about that.
well, thats all that i can think to say. thanks for reading!
1st of june 2026 , 9:51pm
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hello, hope you're well.
oh, i was feeling so sad earlier... i was moping around and feeling bad for myself because of how terrible i am at drawing, and web design, and working... and everything else. i keep forgetting that im supposed to be drawing for fun, and i'm not up against anyone else. i can just have fun, and not be weird and crazy about it. i keep holding myself to such a crazy standard. i'm not michelangelo, i literally just want to draw anime people and stupid creatures. i want to have fun... i want to beat my own ass and just stop caring about this! i thought that doing something more hands-on would help cure my need for perfection in my art. so ive started filling a scrapbook full of my digital art. i guess my thought process is that since a scrapbook is imperfect, it doesnt matter as much if the art is as well. just decorating a page with stickers makes me feel better. i dont know, it works.
heres a few pages that i did!
it was really fun to decorate it and print stuff out. ive been starting to feel like i want to draw more just so that i can put more things in the scrapbook! so ive been drawing a bit more in my spare time. ive also been playing togainu no chi true blood, after putting it on the backburner for so long. ive already played lost blood, so it took me a while to want to play true blood since ive already completed all of the original. its mostly the same. i did yukihito's route first, and that was fun. i wasnt expecting yukikito's personality to be like how it is at all. im not really sure what i was expecting, but when motomi started saying stuff like "yeah, he looks so mean, and hes super suspicious and weird..." i was a bit disappointed. but i finished his route, and hes actually very kind and wonderful. kind of a tough nut to crack i guess, because for basically the whole first half of the vn, you dont even talk to him for more than 2 minutes. every time i saw him id be like "yukihito!!" and then he'd be gone the next second, and it felt like keys were being jingled in front of my face... anyway, i liked the scenes that they added with gunji and kiriwar messing around, and it ended up turning into something like a slice-of-life segment. gunji was just playing with a rubiks cube. im not too sure if that was new content now, because i couldve just forgotten about it happening in the original... im second guessing myself now. either way, it was a nice scene! i like talking about different characters and analyzing them under a microscope, but i thought that it'd be pretty boring to read that, so i got rid of a lot of stuff! no... im just embarrassed...
anyway! i spent some time with my dad yesterday, and it was fun. he tried to get me to watch top gun, and he always tries to convince me to watch movies by saying "you're gay, right? this movie's super gay, you'll love it!" if the undertones are there. hes supportive of me in a really funny way... he gave me an idea for a comic to make the other day, and i finished it today. it was actually my first time drawing a comic ever, since ive always thought that it was a bit of a chore, because you have to draw so much. but i only drew four panels, so i got it done in about a day! i struggled to find the motivation to finish it halfway through, but i imagined my dad going "woah! thats great!" and i managed to successfully complete it. and sure enough, when i printed it out and showed him, he was like "woah! thats great!", so im glad that it at least made someone smile. one thing that i like about it is that i drew a unique angle for every panel, so they didnt all look the same. i know thats probably the bare minimum, but im not used to drawing one environment from multiple angles, so it was a little tough for me! and id like to work on making the environments a little more interesting. i only drew a tv and a window! so next time id like to do that. but overall, i think that its pretty cute lol. you can view it in the gallery,
or you can click here!
i also put a drawing of konoe from lamento that i did in the gallery. i swear, im cursed! almost everything that i upload is a sketch. i just really hate coloring! usually im unbearably embarrassed to upload my art, but i thought hell, im only gonna live once, and someone might get a kick out of seeing it. i thought that just forcing myself to upload it would help me be less shy about it, but im still just as embarrassed lol. im still in the process of getting over myself! i get a little nervous after i finish a drawing, because i start thinking "im gonna be living in a birds nest within the next five years..." because well. ive invested about seven years into learning how to draw gay stuff and nothing else! im mostly joking, but i really do wonder what my life is going to be like in five years... that isnt even that far away, but so many things are going to change. im excited! hopefully ill still be living in a house! well, thats all that i wanted to say. thanks for reading, please stay safe!
21st of may 2026 , 9:18pm
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hello! i hope that your day has been going well.
my lamento visual fanbook green notes came today! wow, that was a mouthful. it was much thicker than i expected! theres a huge amount of stuff in there. it has fully rendered official art in the beginning, which was nice! there are chapters split up into character profiles and sprites, a path of all of the routes and how to get them, and a bit about ribikans and sisa at the end, and all of the information at the end is given to you by tokino lol. oh, and theres some artwork by yuupon at the end as well, which i loved. it was so cute... so, theres a lot. it has every cg, which meant that i had to skip over the section about bardo's route so i wouldnt get spoiled... i havent read it yet!
i havent been able to take any pictures of the contents in good lighting yet, but i at least wanted to take a picture of my favorite cg from the entire vn. i love it so much, and i think its wonderful.
heres the cg! its sfw lol.
rai's version is really pretty too, but this one is just so great to me. the text on the side translates to "thanks for being here with me, i'm so glad." very cute. my asato plush is looking at it in the picture! i wonder what hes thinking... maybe "konoe is amazing."
i was struggling to display it at first, because i didnt have a toploader for it and it kept opening slightly. but i just put an elastic band around it to secure it for now. ever since my artbook fell straight onto my bonsai and knocked the poor thing on the floor, ive been a bit more cautious about displaying books... oh, speaking of, ive finally realized that ive been seriously underwatering my bonsai! i was thinking, why does chris look so sad?! i thought that bonsai just looked like that! so i pruned him, fertilized him, and ill be giving him a lot more water from now on. but not too much... he looks much better already.
heres a picture of chris where he looks much healthier.
some of his leaves are still a bit crispy, but hopefully he'll be better soon. showing you that picture was also just an excuse to show you my lamento fanbook and artbook... i cant talk about it with anyone in my personal life, so this is all i can do! i kinda like that it looks like the shelf is split in two, with the side of the artbook and the hedgehog matching each other, and the konoe and asato figure matching the fanbook and my bonsai (chris). like before the end of times and during it, when the moon was red as hell... omg, lamento reference! thank goodness that i was gifted that hedgehog piggybank! thanks grandma... ive been meaning to get some fun pins and coin figures of konoe and asato as well, and a konoe shikishi. but i need to stop spending so much, so i wont for a while. ive been itching to start doing arts and crafts again because ive been watching videos of people making ita bags and decorations for them. they all look so wonderful, i want to try too! but i need to stop spending so much... hmm... maybe i should sell some stuff. i have a lot of things that i dont really need anymore. i have a perfectly good ukelele that i got years ago, and i never learnt how to play it. maybe...
the weather is so nice today! its bright and sunny. it makes me wanna go for a walk, but im too lazy to change into some outside clothes. maybe tomorrow. i like living in the suburbs, because theres giant fields outside of your house lol. well, thats all i wanted to say! thanks for reading, please stay safe!
18th of may 2026 , 1:08am
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hey! hope you're well.
today i showed my dad my website. hes been wanting to see it for two years, and he finally saw a bit of it in fullscreen so that he couldnt see the url. i have so much gay stuff on my laptop that i was silently crying the whole time as i was going through some of it. thank god that i was talking about the bank holiday last entry! but yeah, he seemed happy to see it after all of this time, and that made me happy. it felt nice to see my hard work being recognized lol. he made me jump out of my skin for a little bit because i thought that he saw the url of this website, but it turns out that he just saw someone elses website url that someone left on the guestbook. he said "yeah i know the url, but ill forget it soon." and i thought that he was talking about mine... stupid! he seemed to like it, so my confidence is a bit higher now. i really dislike showing my work to people that i know personally, because im extremely self-conscious. it felt like showing my soul, thats how important this website is to me! but exposure is the key! maybe ill show my sister... shes been asking to see it too.
my dad and i have been talking about me moving away soon as well. i want to move somewhere pretty far away, and hes worried about me moving there because it has a high crime rate. also because im super bad at remembering to eat! he said that i have to get my microwave license before i can leave... i already have it! im not sure when ill actually move out, but either way, i dont really mind. i like living with my family!
now dad, if you're seeing this, i wanna talk about gay stuff still, so if you've broken your promise and you're seeing this, stop reading! alright... i got my lamento art book that i was talking about a few entries ago, and im super happy about it! it was way bigger than i expected it to be. its huge! it looks pretty nice on my bookshelf as well lol. it accidentally fell over a few days ago and completely knocked my bonsai tree on the floor, so that was a pain to clean up... i was so worried for my plant... but i taped it, so it shouldnt fall now. im too lazy to take photos of it right now, which is annoying me... ill get around to it. maybe ill put them in my lamento shrine that im working on. but yeah, it was great to look through. there were early concept designs for the environments and weapons, which was very fun to see. i loved seeing art of kagari and shui. they looked so pretty! flipping between asato and kaltz's pages was also pretty funny, because you can really see that asato didnt inherit a single gene from kaltz at all... and of course, rai in a swimsuit. there were a lot of staff notes as well, which ill get around to reading eventually. i thought that there would be a lot more sketches of cgs, but it was more of just concept designs of the individual characters and environments. there were sketches of fully rendered offical art on the first few pages though. overall, im very happy! i've ordered the official visual fanbook green notes as well. with the dust jacket, i think... it said in the listing, so i guess so. i think it should be coming in a few days now. i need to be better with my money!
oh, and my asato plushie came! he looks like such an idiot. its probably just me, but his neutral sprite in the game looks mildly confused, and his plushie somehow still conveys that. im probably just seeing things... enough lamento... i pruned and fertilized some of my plants yesterday. i hope that they can grow even stronger and healthier!
well, thats all i can think to say. thanks for reading! please stay safe!
3rd of may 2026 , 9:00pm
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hello! hope you've had a good day.
yes! theres a bank holiday this monday for may day. i'm happy. i absolutely hate mondays! monday isnt much different from any other day in the week for me, but still... i hate them. well, i remember saying that i'd speak about a package thats arrived last entry. so i got a pucca wallet! i wish that i could show you some pictures, but i'm too lazy to take some right now. but its very nice! i'm happy. i've been feeling pretty good for a while now, which feels weird. usually i'm really depressed, but things have been really peaceful lately, and i'm actually enjoying being alive right now. my window is open, so i can hear the birds. and the running water from the pond... and i'm sitting at my desk, and it feels wonderful. oh, theres a really beautiful tree outside of my window, and pigeons and magpies like to perch on it, and i like looking at them go about their business. i just thought of that, since i'm staring right at it right now. i'm so happy to be able to see all of this mundane stuff, because its really pretty, and i can really appreciate it now. its nice...
i had a pretty funny dream the other day. i was opening a package that had my lamento art book in it. when i woke up, i was thinking, "man, i must be way more excited than i thought i was about this". i had another dream as well, but i forgot. so interesting! i sometimes have dreams about lamento in general, because i play it at night before i go to bed. i remember when i was playing togainu no chi and i kept getting nightmares about shiki chasing me through various locations... it was very scary. my lamento dreams are more like, just watching konoe walk through various locations. they're much more peaceful, because luckily there are no malevolent dicators in lamento. unlike togainu no chi... but having dreams about games or movies that i've watched is pretty rare! usually my dreams are just of me walking through random roads that i've never seen in my life until i can find the way back home again. very boring!
you know, my aunt is living in sri lanka right now, and i was thinking that i'd like to go away to a different country and live somewhere new for a while as well. i wanna visit lots of cool places, just to see what its like. but i feel like ill get really lonely. but maybe thats just the payoff! i wanna see as much cool stuff as i can. im not sure where id like to live in particular. i'll think about it.
well, thats all that i wanted to say! i'm happy that i don't have to go to college tomorrow... thanks for reading, please stay safe!
29th of april 2026 , 9:21pm
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hello. hope you're good!
my asato (lamento) figure got delivered today! i was so eager to go straight home to put him on my shelf, but i ended up going to a plant nursery, and i got a really nice new plant and plant pot! the plant itself already came with a pot, but i got a different one instead, and my mom wanted the one it originally came in. so she can use that to plant some new cuttings! very nice. anyway, i went home to open my new asato figure, and the seller i bought him from left a really ornate and beautiful origami crane in the box for me as well. i was blown away... he used such pretty paper! its on my shelf as well now lol. you might be able to see it in the pictures i'm about to show you if you zoom in.
heres some pictures of my asato figure!
i think that he looks really cool. he looks super angry, and because hes next to konoe, it looks like hes shouting at him lol. if you look at the picture in the top-left, you can see a random blue monkey on the figure base. i ran out of things to use as decoration, so i have to use my little kipling monkey. his name is freddie... well, i guess it kinda works, since hes blue? maybe i should buy one of asato's little coin figures as well and him and freddie can hang out. you can see the drama cd in the picture that came with him as well! i was so relieved when i opened the box and saw it... when i bought konoe's figure, the seller made a mistake on the listing and i thought that his cd was included when it wasn't. sad. i mean, i don't even have a cd player to listen to it, but it looks cool.. so its worth it. he comes with his top as well, but i took it off because the feng shui was a little off... much more harmonic and balanced now.
there werent many photos online that i could find of this figure in a clear quality, so it was hard to know what i was really buying. but im so glad that i got him, because he looks so nice! i love having little people on my shelf. its great. i wanna buy rai's figure as well (i also wanna buy a handmade rebecca chambers figure that i saw online...), but i'm not sure when i'll get around to it. you know, the price people were selling bardo's figure for compared to the other three made me laugh quite a bit. bardo isn't sought after at all lol. poor guy... anyway, i'm really happy that i have asato on my shelf now! hes such a wonderful character and i love him a lot! hes incredibly awkward, sincere, tragic and weird and probably autistic and i'm just baffled by him. hes so great.
so yeah, not much else to say. i have another thing arriving tomorrow that i'd like to talk about as well next entry, since this one is already pretty long. thanks for letting me show you my stupid trinkets! please stay safe!
28th of april 2026 , 10:20pm
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hey! nice to see you.
a package that i've been waiting for arrived yesterday.. its my pucca writing set! i love it a lot! my family likes to gather around whenever someone opens a package, so everyone got a kick out of it. a friend of mine used to send me letters on special occasions like my birthdays or my graduation, and i loved it when she wrote to me, so i think that i'll send her a letter with my new cool pucca writing set for her birthday. i'm not too sure what to get for her birthday this year. its in june, so i have a while to think. maybe i could get her a plant? i'm so bad at giving gifts! i'll think of something!
heres a picture of the writing set!
speaking of packages, the asato figure that i ordered is still god knows where. about the thing i said earlier, with my family liking to watch while someone opens a package. i just realized that my family must know every time when a figure that i've ordered has arrived, because the only time that i don't let them see what i'm opening is when its a figure, and then they see something new on my shelf. and then they're like, "can i see your new thing?" but i seriously can't look them dead in the eye and say "yeah, heres my new catboy figure! its from 2006!" to my poor parents.
that reminds me! my mom spoke to me today to tell me that my dad accidentially set her hair on fire, then she left. how that even ended up happening is still beyond me. anyway, i think i'll end this here! thanks for reading, and please stay safe!
26th of april 2026 , 10:20pm
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hello! hope you're well!
gurgh... its monday tomorrow. i might hate mondays even more than garfield. my class starts at 11:50, but i'm still sad. and i'll be at college all day.. but after that, i can go home! and i think i might work on this site a little tomorrow after i get home. i haven't been updating sillian as much as i usually do, because i don't really know what else to add to this place... i've made every main page that i wanted to add. i'll think of something! web design is my passion.. yes..
the sky looks really nice right now. its pitch black. i wonder how many people went to look at the sky after they read that! probably no one lol. i really love the sky, especially at night. i live in the suburbs, so when you look up at night, you can see a lot of stars. its really pretty. you know when you look deep into an open flame, and you're just hypnotized by it? i get that same sort of feeling when i look up at the night sky. its so big and it goes on forever, and you can just stare at it for ages.. its great.
i'm not really sure what else to say. i'm feeling pretty calm right now. i feel like i really want to do the things that i love doing constantly. thats a pretty big feeling that i'm getting right now. i need to make something! i think i'll go and draw. well, thank you for reading this! please stay safe!
23rd of april 2026 , 11:03pm
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hey! nice to see you!
today was my birthday! it was really nice. probably one of the best birthdays that i've ever had. i got some really nice gifts, and i splurged some of my own money to get some things as well... which i'm currently regretting a little bit. but its fine! i spent some time with my family as well, and we watched five nights at freddy's 2 because my sister wanted to. surprisingly, my sister got bored half way through, and my mom was the only one actually immersed in it the whole time. we ordered food, and my dad was actually happy with what he ordered. he always complains about at least one thing, but he was happy with it! i was surprised. even though i had college in the afternoon, celebrating my birthday ended the day off on a great note, so i'm happy! on the way back home after picking up mcdonalds, my sister spoke to me about roblox the whole time. and she totally reminded me of myself when i was her age... like wow.
anyway, yeah, i got some great gifts from my family. i was super happy.. my mom got me this cool pucca shower gel and bath lotion set in this really cute little pouch, and she also got me another pucca themed bath set with some bath bombs and confetti, that i will probably never use because they're too precious... she got me a really cute pucca plushie as well. oh, and some pucca hairpins. as you can tell, i like pucca a lot. pucca is the titular character from the show 'pucca', in case you didn't know. i was extremely happy! i'm not too good at expressing my emotions in situations like birthdays and christmas, but i tried my best to really show how much i loved the gifts that she got me. i kept showing her them lol. usually, i feel quite guilty when my birthday comes around, because we're not the most well-off family. we're quite poor. i hope that they know how happy i am.
my grandma got me a wonderful piggy bank in the shape of a hedgehog as well, which is on my shelf right now. i put some coins in it.. i love it a lot. right, and i did some spending myself as well. i got myself a really cute pucca wallet, and a pucca writing set with some envelopes, a gel pen, and some stickers. and a new pin to put on my pucca bag. more pucca... surprisingly, a lot of pucca merchandise is really cheap. i was able to get all of this stuff for quite cheap. phew...
also, i finally gave in and bought myself a 1/10 figure of asato from lamento as well... i was torturing myself, thinking about if i should buy a figure of asato or the damage version of akira from togainu no chi's 1/8 figure. seriously, i was really scrutinizing over this. i ended up thinking, well, i already have the regular version of the figure, so do i really need the other version as well right now? i can just buy him later if i want to. so i got asato! him and konoe can sit on my shelf together now! oh, and i got the lamento art book, because i love chinatsu kurahana's art. i think shes one of my favorite artists. i just love how she renders her drawings! i remember playing fire emblem three houses, and i thought "man, these character designs are awesome," and then i played togainu no chi. and i was thinking, i feel like i really recognize this artstyle, but i'm not sure where from.. then i found out that tatana kana used to be kurahana's old penname, and that was pretty funny to find out. maybe i should by the three houses art book as well.. that'd be cool. i'm happy that i finally have another art book!
so, great birthday! everyone looked happy, and i'm glad. i'm excited to wear my pucca hairpins. i might use one of the pucca bath bombs as well. maybe...
this is pretty long, so i'll stop here. thanks for reading, and please stay safe!
18th of april 2026 , 2:38pm
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hello. hope you're well.
i finished watching death of a salesman (1985) earlier. i cried four times. i'll cry at anything, but wow, at the end when biff is about to leave for good and he finally speaks to willy properly, it was just so sad. insanely sad. i think its a great movie. come to think of it, i cried at the end of rain man, and dustin hoffman is in that as well. but the movie i've cried the most at is grave of the fireflies by studio ghibli. i spent what felt like an hour sat at the kitchen table just crying. i think it was more like sobbing, because of how sad it made me. god, thats a good movie. it all hits you at once! please watch it. i've been meaning to finish watching noriko's dinner table as well, so that'll be the next movie that i watch.
also, my new porcelain doll came! i've named her kainé, like kainé from nier. i'll put her on the collections page eventually, but i'm too lazy right now. i'm struggling to find a good spot to put her, but i'll find it eventually! right now she's just next to devola and popola. she looks pretty funny lol.
i've found a new band that i really like recently! they're called coo:ya. they're not active anymore sadly, but for some reason, the youtube algorithm has been recommending their songs to a lot of people. i'm happy, because they're really wonderful. miyo, the vocalist, has also been replying to comments that've been made recently as well, and she said that their songs will be on spotify soon.
here's a song that i really like by them.
even if it was twenty years late, i'm happy that i got to find their songs. i really love them. please check them out!
alright, thats all. thank you for reading! please stay safe!
